TBR Pile Review: Life Isn’t Binary, by Meg-John Barker and Alex Iantaffi

Format: 237 pages, Paperback
Published: May 21, 2019 by Jessica Kingsley Publishers
ISBN: 9781785924798 (ISBN10: 1785924796)
Language: English

Description

Challenging society’s rigid and binary ways of thinking, this original work shows the limitations that binary thinking has regarding our relationships, wellbeing, sense of identity, and more. Explaining how we can think and act in a less rigid manner, this fascinating book shows how life isn’t binary.

My Review

This book starts with the obvious understanding of ‘non-binary’ in discussing sexuality and gender, and then goes on to discuss non-binary approaches to relationships, bodies, emotions, and thinking. What this really means is that people tend to think in either/or ways, yes/no, black/white, etc. but the authors recommend more and/both thinking about life.

For someone who is non-binary it is an interesting, yet obvious concept. Although I’m autistic and we’re often accused of black and white thinking, I’ve always wanted to ask why? and my conception of conflict as the stories people tell themselves not meshing completely, already allows me to view reality in a way that includes what the authors refer to as ‘multiversal’. The authors use a therapist and Buddhist way of putting it, but it’s the same thing. Our stories are always changing, we’re always in the process of becoming, not completed, not finalised. And we have many stories, depending on who we’re interacting with.

I found this book fairly interesting. I got through the first four chapters in record time, but the last two chapters seemed to drag a bit. It was mostly the last chapter. I found it a bit woo heavy, especially the ‘make an alter to yourself’ reflection point. I understand the authors are interested in Buddhism, and work as therapists, so it’s understandable. It just doesn’t work for me.

It’s a good introduction to non-binary genders and unconventional relationships.