Review: Unashamed, by Elizabeth G

Unashamed: Why do people pay for sex? BLURB

Elizabeth G. was twenty-two years old and travelling around Australia when she came across a job opportunity at an erotic massage parlour in Sydney. Fast forward eighteen years and she had built up a trusted list of regular clientele working as a high-end London escort and was frequenting some of the city’s most exclusive hotels.

This is an inspirational story of resilience and self-belief in the face of adversity. It gives a fascinating insight into what it’s like to work week in and week out as a sex worker and how it feels to hide who you are from your friends and family. It’s about understanding why a person would pay for sex in the first place. It’s about the positive effects of sex work. It’s about love, connection, nurture and healing. It’s about change. It’s about acceptance. It’s about hitting rock bottom and picking yourself back up, time and time again. It’s about growth, embracing the struggles and learning from your mistakes. And, above all, it’s about breaking through the barriers of shame, and staying true to yourself no matter what.

In shedding a spotlight on the sex industry, Elizabeth hopes to challenge the misconceptions and shame surrounding sex work, and to help provide better protection for those who are forced into the industry as a result.
Unashamed is a no-holds-barred, taboo-busting account of the life of a sex worker, and what it’s like to build a highly successful career in a multimillion-pound industry that exists largely in the shadows. If you want to feel inspired and embrace yourself as a sex worker, or develop an understanding of the profession, or you simply want to eradicate shame in any aspect of your personal life, then look no further.

My Review

Thanks to the publisher for my copy of this book.

A touching memoir of a sex worker, the focus of this book is breaking the shame that keeps sex work in the shadows and results in dangerous situations without recourse to the protections usually afforded to workers.

In chronological order, the reader learns about an idyllic country childhood, teenage rebellion, the hedonistic early 2000s, a brief marriage, sex work to survive, escaping abusive relationships, getting therapy and finally finding a way to thrive as a sex worker and build a good life. We discover an intelligent, educated, empathetic and caring woman who truly loves her job, and wants to make life better for other sex workers and for her clients, offering compassion and respect, and expecting it in return. She has struggled and learnt from her experiences, gained a sense of self-assurance and developed boundaries with the help of her therapist, and it shows in her writing.

The stories of her adventures and misadventures, from here first day as an erotic masseuse to buying her first rental property, interactions with her lovely, and not so lovely, clients, shine a light into this hidden profession. It’s not illegal to buy sex. It’s not illegal to sell sex. It is illegal to advertise or solicit, and it is illegal for two or more sex workers to work together from the same address, as that is classed as running a brothel.

If I remember correctly from previous reading, in a book about how austerity has affected disabled women, it’s also illegal for a sex worker to have someone with them during a booking for their protection, as they are considered a pimp, and if a sex worker’s landlord knows they’re making their living selling sex the landlord, or other tenant on a shared tenancy, they can be charged with profiting from immoral earnings. So, the law doesn’t say you can’t buy sex nor that you can’t sell sex, it just makes it really, really difficult to find clients and to work safely, and punishes anyone around a sex worker, for being associated with a sex worker. It’s not about legality, it’s about morality, and enforcing a certain moral code on society. How does forcing people into working alone, without protection or support, without recourse to resources in times of need, through fear and shame (because we all know the police are arseholes to sex workers) help anyone? It doesn’t. Sex workers will exist as long as humans want to have sex and engage in human contact, because that’s what humans do.

Elizabeth challenges the stereotypes of sex workers as victims, addicted to drugs and alcohol, uneducated, barely surviving and inherently immoral. There are people trafficked into sex work, there are people who do sex work purely to survive and don’t want to do it, there are people who do sex work to feed their addictions, there are uneducated sex workers, but the semi-decriminalised legal status, stigmatising stereotypes and shame associated with the profession don’t help them leave it; it helps traffickers, abusive pimps, rogue agencies and rogue clients get away with criminal acts. Bringing the oldest profession into the light will give these people less space to hide in. If we want to end, or at least decrease, sex trafficking and forced sex work, we need to legalise the profession. Unionise the sex workers! Sex worker professional organisations! Safe, clean working conditions! Destigmatise sex work! End the shame!

(I have a similar attitude to drugs – can’t make a criminal profit from them if they’re decriminalised and accessible cheaply in clean, safe centres, with needle exchanges, medical professionals, social workers and mental health workers on site to help people in need. Also, UBI, because poverty is a major driver of both addiction and sex work).

Also, Elizabeth writes good sex scenes and might want to add writing erotica to her many talents and income streams, seriously, Elizabeth, you have sooo much material to draw on! Write lesbian and bisexual erotica, Elizabeth!

Minor quibbles:

• Bit too much of the law of attraction bullshit for my liking – that’s a personal thing, magical thinking irritates me and it’s unscientific bullshit. Your life got better because you reached a crisis point, recognised that and took steps to improve things. Getting sober put you on the right path, having supporting family, friends, and professional contacts put you on the right path, finding a capable therapist put you on the right path, not some crap made up by an Australian grifter in the 1990s.
• There was some repetition, that was slightly confusing about the order of events. Somethings happen twice? Or possibly different chapters discussed the same events from different perspectives. Didn’t the editor catch that?
• ‘Hence why’ is not grammatically correct! It’s ‘Hence’ or ‘This is why’, since they mean the same thing. Yes, I get upset about minor, and common, grammatical mistakes.

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About Elizabeth G.

Born and raised on a farm in rural Bedfordshire, Elizabeth’s upbringing was a far cry away from the world that awaited her. After graduating from university with a degree in marketing, she broadened her horizons and travelled to Australia. It was during her travels and with funds running low when she came across an opportunity to earn big in a Sydney massage parlour. Here began her years of working in the sex industry; one of the most lucrative industries in the world. Upon returning to the UK and struggling to pay the fees for her master’s degree, Elizabeth made the decision to upgrade from erotic massage therapist to London escort.

Over the course of her career, Elizabeth has evolved from a self-confessed hedonist to the sober and financially independent businesswoman she is today. In sharing her story, Elizabeth hopes to eradicate the shame for those who love working in the sex industry and help provide better protection for those who not only enjoy the industry but also for those who are forced into it. Unashamed is her first book.

Elizabeth G. Social media platforms:
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/elizabeth_g_official/
Twitter: www.twitter.com/elizabethgofcl
TikTok: www.tiktok.com/@elizabethgofficial

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