Category Archives: Reviews

Review: ‘Who Needs Mr Darcy?’

Jean Burnett

2012

Sphere (Little Brown Book Group)

Opening at Pemberley in September 1815 and concluding aboard a ship to Brazil in 1818, this novel follows ‘The adventures and exploits of the bad Miss Bennet’. Lydia Wickham, married three years and widowed at Waterloo, when her husband had the decency to die in battle (although not as heroically as Lydia was telling people), is at a loose end. Currently in residence at Pemberley, living as a dependant of her humourless brother-in-law Darcy and her sister Lizzy, Lydia dreams of escape, of London, Paris and Lord Byron, of making her fortune by marriage to a rich man and dancing among the fashionable world at Almack’s. She has become her husband’s mirror image. Darcy wants rid of her, and Lydia is eager to be got rid of, provided she can have an allowance from her relatives and the freedom to do whatever she wants.

By subterfuge Lydia gets her way and travels to London to stay with the impecunious and immoral Selena and Miles Caruthers, friends from her days as an army wife. On the way she is robbed by a handsome highwayman, in London she plays with marked cards and becomes involved with a banker. Travelling to Brighton she meets the Prince Regent, becomes involved in a murder and robbery, and is kidnapped by her highwayman

Eventually Lydia finds her way to the no longer fashionable Bath, as her banker is arrested and she acquires a new admirer. Plans are made for Paris, but first she must go to Pemberley. Here a letter arrives from Longbourne; Kitty, who Lydia has kept informed of all her adventures, has had an attack of conscience and drops Lydia in it up to her neck. Sent away to be a companion to a rich, elderly widow (it was that or the asylum, suitable husbands not being forthcoming) in Bath, Lydia despairs.

Until she hatches a plan and her employer is persuaded to end her retired life and go to the Continent. Lydia is ecstatic and finally gets to see Paris and Venice. But her past catches up with her and she is forced to work for the British Government in a delicate matter.

This Lydia is has learnt no restraint, no humility or respectability. She is as immodest, reckless and ignorant as would be expected from the youngest Bennet girl. She blames all her misfortunes on others and takes no responsibility for her actions. She sees her family as interfering, disapproving and spiteful.

She is not an endearing character at all, and the plot has too much gothic extravagance about it to be very enjoyable, and yet I raced through this novel. More could have been made of the royal intrigue, financial scandal and international politics, which are the main drivers of the plot and which effect Lydia’s fate the most, but the story, like it’s narrator is rather shallow. Leaving Lydia and her criminal beau aboard ship and bound for Brazil clearly leaves the way open for a sequel should the author choose to pen one.

I think this would have been a fun book, in the mould of Regency romances, if the main character had been an original rather than a pale attempt at writing Lydia Bennet. Jean Burnett simply does not write Lydia Bennet as well as Jane Austen drew her two hundred years ago. The character is a flat caricature. It’s enjoyable enough I suppose but I wouldn’t go out and buy it. That’s what the library is for.

And that is all I have to say on the subject.

Bye,

Rose

In none writing related news…well, actually…

I have a job interview next week.

If I get the job I’ll probably be working twelve hour shifts, which means I’ll have less time for writing, but more money to do the things I like to write about. It’ll work out somehow. I’m not going to stop writing just because I finally get a decent lab job.

That’s it, that’s all I was going to say.

Hang on, no it’s not.

I was reading ‘The shifting price of prey’ by Suzanne McLeod, but I couldn’t get into it, despite enjoying the earlier books in the ‘Spellcrackers.com’ series. It’s going back to the library. I might take it out again in the future.

Books I’m looking forward to reading this year include:

The Science of Discworld IV by Terry Pratchett, Jack Cohen and Ian Stewart
Published 11th April 2013

The Long War by Terry Pratchett and Stephen Baxter
Published 20th June 2013

Albums I am looking forward to hearing this year:

Fall Out Boy
‘Save Rock and Roll’
15th April 2013

Sacred Mother Tongue
‘Out Of The Darkness’
15th April 2013

HIM
‘Tears on Tape’
29th April 2013

30 Seconds to Mars
‘Love, Lust, Faith + Dreams’
21st May 2013

I intend to review them all.
And now I must go, I’ve got a computer booked at the library in ten minutes.

Bye Bye

Rose

Restaurant Review: The Barge, Grimsby

29th March 2013

 

I’m sat on The Barge

Bored

Waiting for my food

 

I can’t drink because I’m on my

Scooter

And my head feels funny

Because I’m

Waiting for my food

 

It’s always worth the

Wait

Though because the food

At The Barge

Is the best in

Grimsby

 

So I’ll sit here

People watching and writing

Waiting for my food

 

Yes, while waiting I composed a poem about The Barge. I had little else to do except write and wait for my meal. I’ve eaten at this particular place a few times and never been disappointed.

The Barge is a popular place to eat and drink in Grimsby, especially for those who enjoy their music heavy (the most ‘pop’ music I’ve ever heard on their jukebox was Bon Jovi, and that’s only during the day. After 5pm it gets heavier and louder). Today it is particularly busy, their ‘2 jumbo fish, chips and peas for £14.99’ offer might have something to do with that. Despite its popularity The Barge is never packed during the day.

I ordered the ‘Barge Gourmet Burger’ for £7.95 and the special ‘Crème Egg Cheesecake with Vanilla Ice-cream’ for £2.00 (£2.95 if I hadn’t bought a main course as well), as well as a large Diet Pepsi (£1.95). The staff are friendly and polite, and although it took about 20 minutes for the food to arrive, they brought my cutlery and any sauce I requested immediately.

The burgers were just cooked, only just for my taste, but succulent and full-flavoured, the cheese generous, I could have done with a bit more bacon, although it was just right in terms of how well it was cooked. Any longer and it would have been too crispy. The onion rings, fresh, home-made onion rings, were perfect. They actually tasted of onion for a start; they were hot, but not scolding, crispy and golden. The chips were also home-made, chunky and golden. There didn’t appear to be a lot at first sight but the size of them made up for that. The salad and coleslaw was no mere accompaniment either but an integral part of the meal. The coleslaw was fresh, and also home-made, large slices of cabbage, onion and carrot well covered by mayonnaise. It was lovely.

My dinner: The Barge gourmet burger, with chips and salad
My dinner: The Barge gourmet burger, with chips and salad

I wasn’t sure I’d have room for a pudding after the main course but I thought I’d give it a try. And I was well rewarded. The base was thick and the cheesecake topping creamy. The ice-cream was excellent quality.

 

All in all, though it is a little expensive, if you happen to be in Grimsby for any reason and want a decent meal, ignore McDonalds and take a walk to the Freshney. You can’t miss The Barge, it’s a bloody great big barge concreted into the dock.

Bye for now

Rose

Review: The City’s Son: Book 1 of the Skyscraper Throne

Tom Pollock

Jo Fletcher Books (Quercus)

2012

I picked this up in the library about two weeks ago and it’s taken me a while to get through it. I think it’s meant to be a YA fantasy, but I had trouble deciding who the target audience were. The main characters were certainly adolescent, but it could as easily be read by adults.

Set in contemporary London the story follows the adventures of teenage graffiti artist Beth Bradley and her best friend and poet of the streets Pen (Parva Khan) as they get drawn into the war between the Urchin Prince, Filius Viae, and Reach, the Crane King.

Switching between the viewpoints of Beth and Filius the story tells of the midnight encounter with a railwraith by Beth and her involvement with Filius, as Pen is fighting her own battles. Betraying her only friend after one particular night of artistic revenge on a bullying teacher, Pen loses Beth to the hidden London. Beth’s father goes in search of her and Pen comes along to help. Unfortunately they are ambushed by Reach’s minion ‘The Wire Mistress’ who takes Pen as her avatar.

Meanwhile Beth and Filius are trying to build an army while waiting for his Mother, the Goddess of the Streets to return and help them; an army of statues, and lamp people, and one homeless Russian. Plus a person made of rubbish.

In fighting the war many battles are won and lost, lives lost and choices made. Sometimes you have to make a deal, and pay the price in the end. But the price of victory might not be worth paying. Beth has to decide as she becomes Filia Viae to Filius’s Filius Viae.

Although it took me a while to read this, I enjoyed it and will probably read the next one. The book feels allegorical; do we allow skyscrapers and things of glass and steel to destroy the life found in old city streets, is it progress or the killing of a place to change it? Renewal or ripping away of life? These are clearly pressing matters to think on and a balance or compromise has to be found, as Beth does. We have decisions to make, will we choose right, strike the right bargains and are we willing to pay the price for our choices?

Bye, for now

Rose

Just as soon as I get my laptop to a wifi connection…

Good afternoon,

Having a bit of a lazy day today since my back is bad again. But I have managed to get a bit of writing done. I went out yesterday afternoon to a place that does children’s parties. Not because I’m weird, mostly groups of children irritate me, no, it was my godson’s birthday party. And since the venue is in a tourist town I thought I’d review it, for anyone unfortunate enough to be caught in Cleethorpes on a wet day. I shall probably post my review on Saturday.

Other than that I’ve been for a walk, did some of my computer course work and finished reading ‘The Black Butterfly’ by Mark Gatiss. And eaten six Cadbury’s Creme Eggs – which is not something I recommend anyone doing. I feel quite unwell now 😦

Bye,

Rose

Review: The wisdom of the Shire: A short guide to a long and happy life

Noble Smith

Hodder & Stoughton

2012

As I said yesterday, I don’t read self-help books but I got sucked in by the Tolkien canon concept. There’s a reason for this; I get the feeling that the authors of such books are a bit smug. They might not be, but why would you write a book telling people how to live, or reach enlightenment, or how to pull, if you don’t believe that you know it all already and are kindly dispensing your wisdom to the world? So I’m a bit cynical; I don’t care how long you’ve been a Tolkien ‘enthusiast’, otherwise known as a fan, have you got something new to say, or are you just taking advantage of the fact that the ‘Hobbit’ films are popular at the minute?

As it turns out Mr Smith has nothing new to say on living a good life: sleep when you’re tired, only take what is sufficient to life, don’t be greedy or grasping, be a good neighbour and friend, treat the earth with respect and be a part of your community. None of this is new, but using the characters from The Hobbit and The Lord of the Rings as his exemplars is. Much of the information asterisked as footnotes are obvious, irrelevant to the main text or things already known by those who are fans of Middle Earth.

All that being said, Mr Smith is passionate about the subject and that is obvious from his writing and the personal examples included affected me. His plan for a small ‘Hobbit garden’ is an interesting extra, he missed out Sam’s nasturtiums though :D. Most of all it has pushed me back to my copy of The Lord of The Rings, which sits accusingly on my bedside table, demanding to know when I am going to carry on reading it? The answer is, later, after I’ve made my pack up for work tomorrow.

I wouldn’t particularly recommend this book as weekend reading, but if you happen to see it in the library and like Middle Earth it would be a new approach to the works of Tolkien.

Bye,

Rose

I really should finish reading what I’ve started first, but still…

This morning I took my nephew to the library to get some more books and to take my book back. I had no intention of getting another book, since I still have two other books to finish reading, but then I saw this book, ‘The Wisdom of the Shire’ by Noble Smith.

I don’t generally go in for ‘self-help’ books but I have a thing for the works of JRR Tolkien and the book seemed to be a different take on the whole world of Middle Earth. So I’m going to read it. But first I’m going to follow Mr Smith’s advice and get some sleep because I’m tired.

I’ll let you know what I think of the book when I finish it. Have a nice afternoon, and I hope you’re all safely in your Hobbit-holes nice and warm in this cold weather.

Bye,

Rose