Category Archives: Depression

Annoying myself

So, it’s official, I’m an idiot.

One of my coping mechanisms when I have stuff going round my brain is to write it down like a blog post then hit the little rubbish bin.

Except this afternoon I hit publish by accident and something was published that should never have seen the light of day. Luckily, only two or three people saw it, and one of them rang me to tell me. I’ve taken my rantings down obviously, and deleted the links I could find, but still the damage might have been done.

I’ve been ruminating on it for the last two hours, but now I feel better. Writing works as catharsis but I need to remember when it’s appropriate to publish my thoughts and when it isn’t.

I need to find a less risky cathartic outlet, just in case I forget. Again.

Choo! Choo!

http://www.geograph.org.uk/photo/767391
http://www.geograph.org.uk/photo/767391

My granddad’s pride and joy was his train track. He’d turned the box room in to his train room and it was out of bounds to us children unless supervised by a responsible adult. The only adult considered responsible was my granddad himself. After my grandma died when I was nine I spent a lot of time with Granddad, we used to go to model railway meetings sometimes. They were like fairs, held in scout huts and prefab village halls. I had a small collection of model railway magazines. It was fun, mainly because I got to spend time with Granddad Billy without my sisters and cousins, and I got treat to sweets and other junk food granddad really shouldn’t have given me.

Continue reading “Choo! Choo!”

Tis the season to be jolly

Or not.

I had a bad night and today hasn’t been much better but I’m getting my head sorted. The things that were worritting at me have been dealt with, and now I’m trying not to focus on them until they are resolved. I’ve done my part and I can’t control the rest. Continue reading “Tis the season to be jolly”